How Can I Gain The Trust Of My Teenage Child? – Being Parents
Children grow up and every parent asks the same question. “How do I gain the trust of my teenage child?” Many mistakenly believe that estrangement is part of a simple stage of rebellion. However, not all cases are the same.
The parent-child relationship does not always deteriorate. It depends on a set of aspects. For example, the compatibility of characters and internal processes of the young. The relationship is forged from childhood and all past experiences influence it.
Of course, what happened in the past cannot be fixed. But is there anything we can still do to be closer to our children in their teenage years? There are a lot of experts who say yes, and a lot of factors influence it. One of these important variables is the attitude of the parents.
It’s time to take the test
During childhood, we were the mirror in which our children looked at each other. What we often don’t understand is that this value relationship changes as it grows. Once they feel “older” and independent, young people begin to assess things for themselves.
Parents will not be the exception to this weighting of teenagers. By its complexity, adolescence is a stage where the parent will be put to the test, beyond his authority.
The teenager will measure certain aspects of his parents’ attitude. Among them, morality, justice, patience, openness, understanding, etc. Adolescent rebellion certainly plays a predominant role. They check whether, as parents, we will give them everything they ask for.
Gaining the Confidence of My Teenage Child : Control or Confidence
It is one of the aspects that can separate or unite a mother with her child. During the emotional emancipation, the youth value to be trusted and that they are treated not like children. There are many times when parents have to choose between trusting or controlling.
From day to day, circumstances will arise which will force us to control, punish, prevent or prevent. But even in these cases, there are still alternatives and approaches to deal with the situation. Of course, other occasions will also have to be trusted.
Our level of permissiveness will waver between control and trust. Therefore, parents will need to be careful not to behave in an irrational or subjective way. Talking, offering positive reinforcement, and not giving orders is the key to success.
Rather than giving orders, set limits
A teenager is close to being an adult. So it makes sense that he doesn’t understand when given strict orders. On the contrary, what must be done is to give it freedom gradually. That is, by establishing certain limits.
For these reasons, it is better to put orders aside. Instead, start stipulating room for action. So there are limits on the hours and time to go home, the spaces to be frequented, etc. Of course, in the face of imminent risks, we will have to refuse permission, but always explaining the reason.
When we allow, we do something more important: let it breathe. By doing this, we give a mark of trust and respect to his own personality. Either way, sooner or later the youngster will have to start fending for himself.
Lots of effective communication
If you have asked yourself, “How do I gain the trust of my teenage child?” Another answer is communication. But we won’t always communicate like the authorities we are, or in the familiar ways we would like as parents.
At this stage, the main thing is to find effective communicative bridges, common themes, tones, spaces and uses of language. It makes sense that the teenager’s parent reinvents himself in anticipation of his young child.
It won’t be easy. You cannot expect young people to always want to share their emotional life. Even those who idolize their parents find this outsourcing difficult. The rest is to understand that they will exercise their privacy.
How can I gain the trust of my teenage child?
As we have seen, the main thing is to understand that children have definitely grown up. Indeed, they will soon enter adulthood. Likewise, parents of young children should be vigilant. Confidence in the adolescent’s future is built from childhood.
Everything seems to indicate that the manipulation and transition of parental fear has negative effects with the passage of time. A child who has always been free and understood will not feel the need to break free. At least it seems logical, even in current psychology.
