7 Common Mistakes In Raising Children – Being Parents

Many parents live with insecurity and anxiety when it comes to educating their children. It is because they have doubts about how to give the best direction and the best possible education to this being they love so much.

The most frequently asked questions are: how do I make myself obey? Am I too strict, bossy or too lax? Should I have punished him? To be a good parent, you need to avoid common mistakes in raising children with these few tips.

Common mistakes in raising children

Knowing about a whole host of mistakes you shouldn’t make when it comes to educating your child can help. Having these principles in mind will be important in order not to cause emotional damage and injury, nor to grow up without losing the North.

1. The dissonances between authority figures

The absence of a union of criteria between the two parents is one of the big mistakes of parenthood. Indeed, if the child receives contradictory messages, he does not know whom to obey. As a result, he will feel disoriented, without clear references.

To avoid such a situation in the child, if you are not sure of the best decision to make, it is recommended that you say something like: “ We will talk about it later and we will give you an answer ”.

In this way, you convey the image of a couple of parents who support each other and are united.

2. Lack of consistency

Parents should not be swayed by their mood for the day when it comes to discipline. In other words, you should not allow certain behaviors depending on whether you feel happy, angry, more or less tired.

If this happens, children can receive a confusing and even embarrassing message because decisions would be devoid of fundamental principles. Parents should keep in mind that education must be fair and rational at all times.

3. Use derogatory phrases with children

Unfortunately, it is very common for parents to speak with children with some disrespect. For example, with expressions like: “You are useless”, “I knew you were going to break it”, “You always disappoint me”.

These words can hurt and deeply mark a child. Adults should try to maintain their role and control their attitude, even if the child provokes them.

4. Promises that we do not keep

Many children are discouraged and disappointed because their parents offer them gifts or rewards if they are fulfilling their school obligations, as well as if they are doing homework or just to be obedient.

However, even though they strive for their reward, sometimes they don’t get it because their parents don’t respect the deal.

The best thing to do to prevent this from happening is for adults to be consistent and realistic when promising rewards. Obviously, we must not break his word.

5. Don’t set clear boundaries

Often, one of the common mistakes in raising children is the lack of a clear goal of how to educate them. Therefore, parents do not agree with their criteria and neither do they set standards.

When children are small, it is easier to deal with any difficulties that arise. However, in adolescence control and authority are easily lost.

This makes it much more difficult to respect the rules and limits. The best thing to do is to set concrete rules and limits that can be obeyed.

6. Make friends with children

It is a mistake to treat children as friends because parents must exercise their role of guide. Children really need an authority figure who matches parents. Logically, this should always happen within the framework of good treatment and mutual trust.

7. Set a bad example

In general, parents ask their children not to do things because they are bad. However, children usually see them doing them. These inconsistencies are harmful and harm the child. It also reduces the legitimacy to the parent’s authority and reduces moral strength.

Some suggestions for the education of children

Finally, we will present some ideas that you can put into practice so as not to make the common mistakes in raising children that we have already mentioned at the beginning of this article.

• Set clear and reasonable limits. It is an act of deep love.

• Children need structure, order and fixed rules.
• This allows them to experience the consequences of their actions. In addition, it facilitates their autonomy and independence.
• Give them obligations based on their age.
• Don’t let unwanted behaviors slip through which, in the long run, lead to bad behavior.

In short, frequent mistakes in raising children lead to bad behavior in adulthood. By identifying these mistakes, you can avoid them with your children and thus be successful in their education.