Self-control In Children – Being Parents

The goal is to reflect and regulate impulses. Self-control in children is achieved with patience and persistence. The result will be a child with a better disposition to face adversity and calm, content parents.

How to deal with rebellion or crisis?

When docility begins to give way to autonomy, signs of rebellion appear. If these manifestations do not go away on their own, we will have to act. Teaching the child to regulate his emotions will prevent future behaviors of permanent disobedience.

Techniques for achieving self-control in children

Neurological maturation in children begins after six years. At this time, he begins to develop cognitive skills to master himself. Good teaching can bring out the  right strategies for controlling destructive impulses and channeling emotions.

A volcano without eruption

When the child is about to explode, the volcano technique will help calm him down. It consists of teaching him to visualize his interior like a volcano, with all his strength and energy. When it bursts everything gets out of hand. The child must associate anger or rage with hot lava.

The idea is that you can stop before you reach the point of eruption. You must accompany this with a deep breath and the repetition of the internal commands that encourage him to calm down.

The Red light

With cards of the three colors the child can learn to analyze his behavior. The red light appears just as the situation is about to get out of hand. The correct sentences are:

• Red light: stop, calm down, think before you act.
• The yellow light: think of the solutions or the consequences.
• Green light: go ahead, put the best solution into practice.

Patience, learn to wait

Children must learn to wait. Patience is fundamental to achieving self-control in children. Self-control increases the chances of success.

They can also be taught that, counting to ten, anger will go away. Another option is to move him away from whatever is bothering him until he regains his composure.

The reflection

Achieving greater self-control in children involves teaching them to think. Through language, one can analyze, plan and better understand the environment and make decisions. It is a post-conflict strategy. Indeed, in the turmoil of the moment, it has no effect.

Parents, the best example

If we understand that children see their parents as the best role model, leading by example is vitally important.

The memory of adult emotional reactions can influence children’s behavior. It will also have an influence on their management of frustration.

Positive behaviors should characterize adults under stress, fatigue and distress. It is advised that they express their feelings, take a deep breath, and count to 10 before reacting.

In addition, parents can play sports with their children to channel their negative emotions.

Learn from a mistake

Avoiding the suffering of children is the aspiration of every good parent. However, sometimes this can be a mistake. A child cannot grow up without experiencing frustration.

However, you are advised not to pamper a child too much, as this can generate in them an inability to cope with future challenges.

The best way to achieve self-control in children is to encourage them to channel their frustrations.

Some sentences help: “What do you think if we start with the easiest?” “What part do you need my help in?” “What can you do for yourself?” Another very effective phrase is: “Let’s rest and try again later”.

Quiet place

In the house or in the classroom, there can be a special place where the child can go if he needs to calm down. There must be books, toys, leaves, paint, a board, or anything else that helps her feel at peace.

Anti-stress balls

These elements work with adults, but also with children. Especially if they build them themselves. Only a thick balloon filled with birdseed or rice is needed. The only constraint is that the ball must fit in the child’s hand.